Seks Hebat Selepas Usia 50?

TIDAK ramai yang mahu memperkatakan tentang seks selepas menopaus (bagi wanita) dan lelaki yang mencecah usia 50 tahun. Kalangan masyarakat timur yang terikat dengan budaya dan agama, seks bukan topik yang boleh dibual bicara secara bebas. Apatah lagi seks pada usia emas.

Tentu ada segan dan silu mahu bercakap tentang isu itu lantaran pada usia emas, ramai yang percaya seks bukan sesuatu yang penting. Malah, ada wanita yang terus meminggirkan seks biar pun hakikatnya ruang dan waktu untuk bersama pasangan amat terbuka luas selain tidak lagi ‘diganggu’ anak-anak yang telah dewasa. Lain pula ceritanya bagi lelaki. Usia bukan faktor, walaupun ada istilah andropaus untuk merujuk kepada ‘kebolehan’ mereka tetapi lelaki selalu mendakwa ‘boleh’ tidak kira berapa usia.

Hakikatnya seks pada usia emas tidak hanya terbatas di ranjang. Kemesraan, belaian, jalan berpimpin tangan serta saling mencurahkan perasaan mesti terus dipupuk. Tanggapan bahawa seks dan usia emas tidak lagi berjalan seiring menjadi salah satu punca kadar perceraian di kalangan warga emas semakin meningkat.

Lantaran kekosongan waktu tidak diisi, kesunyian tidak dirawat menjadikan usia emas ‘titik’ pemula kepada pasangan suami isteri memulakan hidup baru dengan memilih untuk bersendirian atau mencari ‘teman’ baru.

Seperti mana kita sering melihat pasangan warga emas dari Eropah terutamanya menghabiskan usia tua melancong sambil mengembalikan kehangatan ‘bercinta’, itulah sebenarnya salah satu cara untuk memastikan rumahtangga yang dibina kekal ke akhir hayat.

Kajian Pengarah San Diego Sexual Medicine Alvarado Hospital, Irwin Goldstein mendapati seks yang paling hebat di muka bumi ini adalah selepas usia 50 tahun.

Tentu timbul persoalan benarkah begitu dan mengapa?

“Anda tidak perlu risau didatangi haid, anak-anak di dalam rumah dan boleh mengadakan hubungan seks di mana-mana bilik yang anda suka,” katanya.

Menurut seorang lagi penyelidik, seks semasa usia 40-an bukannya tidak hebat, tetapi wanita masih terikat dengan jadual menyediakan makan tengah hari, ‘berperang’ dengan karier dan paling penting mengelak daripada hamil.

“Usia 40 ke 50 ada titik kebimbangan bagi kebanyakan wanita kerana mereka masih boleh hamil.

”Apabila menopaus kebimbangan itu lenyap,” kata profesor perubatan, fisiologi dan biofizik University of Colorado Health Science Center, Denver.

Fikirkan, tanpa tampon, pelapik seluar dalam, pil, diafgram, IUD atau kondom, apa lagi yang lebih teruja selain menikmati seks tanpa ada rasa kecamuk di dalam fikiran.

Selepas berusia 50 tahun, kemungkinan anak-anak mengganggu mana-mana sesi ‘bilik tidur’ atau mengejutkan anda di tengah malam amat jarang berlaku. Semestinya keadaan itu merupakan peluang yang ditunggu-tunggu kebanyakan pasangan suami isteri dalam proses mendapatkan kepuasan daripada hubungan seks yang mereka jalin.

Tiada gangguan, jawapannya seks berlangsung secara ‘aman’, tidak juga perlu melakukannya dalam keadaan terburu-buru atau berhati-hati.

Faktor itu dilihat oleh Profesor Madya Amanda Richards yang juga pakar perbidanan di University of Miami Miller School of Medicine sebagai amat penting.

”Anak-anak semakin berdikari dan pasangan suami isteri mempunyai lebih masa untuk diri dan hubungan mereka sendiri,” katanya.

Ingat watak Mrs. Robinson dalam siri The Graduate pada tahun 1960-an? Warga emas tahu apa yang mereka mahukan semasa di kamar tidur dan tidak segan silu untuk berterus terang mengenainya.

“Menopaus adalah masa yang amat penting bagi kebanyakan wanita. Ramai yang sedar mereka telah mengetepikan kepentingan seksualiti sejak sekian lama, dan jika kesempatan yang ada tidak digunakan sepenuhnya, tidak akan ada peluang lagi untuk mereka.

“Terdapat data menunjukkan wanita semakin relak dan selesa dengan pasangan masing-masing apabila meningkat usia. Keadaan itu boleh menambah baik prestasi seksual mereka,” kata Dr. Richard dalam satu jurnal kesihatan.

Jika nafsu seks merupakan satu masalah, pengurusan hormon yang kini banyak ditawarkan di klinik-klinik boleh membantu. Sementara penggunaan terapi penggantian hormon secara tradisional yang mengandungi estrogen dan progestin tidak lagi digalakkan kerana risiko terhadap kesihatan dan jantung, masih ada pilihan lain.

Terapi hormon yang mementingkan testosterone telah diuji dan dikaji sebagai salah satu cara untuk merangsang nafsu tanpa kesan sampingan.

Memang benar perubahan hormon semasa pertengahan usia boleh menyebabkan kekeringan vagina.

Tetapi keadaan itu boleh dijadikan alasan untuk mencuba dan melalui pengalaman baru yang lebih menarik hasil penggunaan cecair pelincir yang direka khas untuk mengatasi masalah tersebut

“Kekeringan vagina selepas menopaus akan mendorong wanita bereksperimen dengan cecair pelincir yang direka khas untuk membantu merehatkan otot-otot sekeliling bagi menikmati seks selepas menopaus,” kata Dr. Richard.

Selain gangguan anak-anak, nafsu dan hormon, usia 50 tahun adalah masanya untuk menikmati faedah sebenar selepas dibelenggu pelbagai hutang untuk membeli rumah serta kenderaan yang selesa.

Anda boleh melakukan hubungan seks di mana-mana saja yang anda inginkan di rumah yang bukan lagi milik bank.

Pada usia tersebut juga kedudukan kewangan pasangan semakin kukuh, oleh itu menikmati makan malam mewah dan romantik pastinya mampu merangsang keinginan untuk hubungan yang lebih intim.

Pastinya, wanita menopaus tidak lari daripada dilanda stres. Tetapi pada usia tersebut, anda tidak akan berasa tertekan disebabkan oleh kerja seperti mana ketika berusia 20an, 30an dan 40an.

Wanita menopaus selalunya telah mencapai kemuncak kerjaya, justeru mereka kurang berasa tertekan. Tekanan atau stres mempunyai kesan negatif kepada keinginan seksual.

”Salah satu mimpi ngeri banyak wanita menopaus bukannya kebebasan untuk mengadakan hubungan seks di mana sahaja tetapi mempunyai pasangan yang tidak boleh ‘beraksi’ di mana-mana sahaja,” kata Dr. Goldstein.

Apa juga masalah – ejakulasi pra-matang, kegagalan erektil dan hormon yang rendah – sentiasa ada rawatan susulan daripada dunia perubatan moden yang boleh membantu menyelesaikan masalah tersebut.

”Wanita menopaus kebiasaannya mempunyai pasangan yang lebih berusia, di mana, jika mahu dikaitkan dengan soal ‘prestasi, lebih bersifat terbuka dan bersedia menggunakan pelbagai kaedah untuk mendapatkan pengalaman seksual yang lebih memuaskan,” kata Dr. Richard.h

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